Feeling Stressed? Here are 3 Tips to Cope With Holiday Stress

The holidays are an exciting time but that excitement brings stress too. Between coordinating logistics, interpersonal drama, and potential financial burdens, not to mention less daylight, it’s understandable to feel overwhelmed by the fast approaching holiday season. With some forethought and planning though it doesn’t have to drown you. Here are Embrace Sexual Wellness’ best tips for not just surviving but thriving this holiday season so you can enjoy yourself to the fullest extent possible.

Clearly Identify and establish personal boundaries

• Boundaries are important year-round but they should most certainly be shored up ahead of a known stressful time. Family and boundaries can be particularly tricky so it might take more discipline to hold your ground. If you’re not sure where to start with determining and communicating your boundaries, check out this ESW article

Expect and accept imperfection

• It might sound obvious but it’s still important to intentionally remember that even the best laid plans go awry. In these moments, try reflecting on the true importance and priorities of the holidays: spending time with people you love.

Make an escape plan

Even the closest and calmest families and/or friends can feel overwhelming at times so consider planning how you might be able to get a break during the festivities before they begin. Whether that means going for a walk or a drive, stepping into the washroom, or finding another reprieve, knowing you have a plan to catch your breath can be stress reducing in and of itself.

These tips won’t solve all your problems or prevent stress completely, but they can certainly help ease your burden. We wish you and your loved ones the happiest holiday season!

What Do You Look for in a Therapist?

Finding a therapist is no easy feat. From insurance to personality compatibility to coordinating schedules, searching for the right mental health professional can be understandably overwhelming. This article is meant to guide you through the process, covering how to find the right fit, how to tell if they’re the right fit, and how to measure quality of care.

Where to begin your search

• Word of mouth is a great way to find therapists in your area, especially if the recommendation comes from someone who knows you and your needs well. If you do want to pursue a recommendation from a friend, make sure you check that it’s not a conflict of interest to see the same therapist. 

• If you are insured, a good place to start is your insurance company’s directory of in-network professionals. 

• If you are uninsured or you’re looking for alternative search engine options, here are some alternative places to look for a therapist.

  • Open Path Collective

    1. “Open Path Psychotherapy Collective is a nonprofit nationwide network of mental health professionals dedicated to providing in-office and online mental health care—at a steeply reduced rate—to clients in need.” 

  • Inclusive Therapists

    1. “Seeking therapy can be a vulnerable process. We understand. We aim to make it simpler and safer for people in marginalized communities. Find a culturally responsive, 2SLGBTQ+ affirming therapist that celebrates your full identity” 

  • APA Psychologist Locator

    1. APA is the leading scientific and professional organization representing psychology in the United States, with more than 133,000 researchers, educators, clinicians, consultants, and students as its members.

  • TherapyDen

    1. “We are an online community of mental health professionals seeking to make the experience of finding a therapist easy.” 

  • Therapy For Black Girls

    1. “So often the stigma surrounding mental health issues and therapy prevents Black women from taking the step of seeing a therapist. This space was developed to present mental health topics in a way that feels more accessible and relevant.”

Considerations for your search parameters

• Finding the name of a therapist is one thing, but it’s an entire other thing to find a therapist who works for you and your needs.  

• When you’re considering what might make a therapist a good fit for you, think first of whether or not you have any identity preferences such as gender or race that would allow a therapist to relate to certain experiences. 

• Before meeting with a therapist, try to do initial phone screenings of several options to ask about their specialties, whether they have experience with your specific issues, what structure their sessions usually follow, and any other information that you might need. 

• Logistical factors you may need to take into consideration are location, cost, mutual schedule availability, and the therapist’s availability outside of sessions, such as for emergencies. 

How to tell if they’re the right fit

• You feel comfortable being vulnerable around them (at least relative to others)

•  They have strong, clearly communicated boundaries about their policies and personal life

• You are able to share concerns about the therapeutic relationship and they respond with openness and a desire to problem solve 

• They respect your values and identity 

• They guide you to your goals and coach you to be able to make your own decisions 

• They challenge you in constructive ways. For example, they might ask you to reconsider a self-deprecating statement and work to get to the root of the thought in order to unpack it

Signs that they’re not a good fit

• They judge you or shame you 

• They have no experience with your issue(s)

• They overshare about themselves

• They tell you what to do rather than guiding you to make your own decisions

• You regularly feel worse after your session

It will take some time to find a therapist who works for you and when you’re in need of help, that can be discouraging. Perhaps try asking a trusted friend or family member to aid you in your search and/or ask them to sit with you for moral support while you do it. Once you do find a good therapist, it will be worth it. Simply wanting to seek help is a huge first step so show yourself gratitude for taking the time to read this. If you are seeking therapy for concerns related to sexuality or your relationships, consider reaching out to Embrace Sexual Wellness to see if our team might be a good fit for you. 

3 ways to be an Educated Consumer of Mental Health Information Online

A study by McKinsey found that Gen Zers have the least positive life outlook. The COVID-19 pandemic has only exacerbated the already widespread mental health issues of young people. Social media has been a resource for education and connection surrounding mental wellness but it can be tough to parse the helpful from the not so helpful. The internet is a treasure trove of information, but unfortunately not all of it is accurate, especially on social media. With the right presentation and delivery, it isn’t difficult to convey convincing information regardless of how truthful it is. Furthermore, in the context of an isolating global crisis, everyone is desperate for connection and community so it may be easier to ignore warning signs of misinformation in search of that connection. While it’s great that social media allows us to have larger conversations about mental health and coping, those positive effects are undermined by misinformation. 

There is nothing shameful about trusting an inaccurate source. It’s important, however, to make sure that any information about mental health, especially if it’s actionable, is factual and helpful for a particular individual. As the Psychiatric Times explains, “media pollution, which can intensify anxiety… as well as contribute to unsuccessful therapies… is inextricably linked to misinformation and false news.” So not only is mental health misinformation irresponsible to spread, but also actively harmful. On that note, you should ensure that everything you share in addition to consume is accurate, to the best of your ability. Unfortunately, one study found that “experiencing clinical depression was still strongly associated with an increased likelihood of endorsing misinformation” which makes it even more difficult to parse through. Here are some suggestions that may help you navigate this complicated landscape:

Don't take things at face value; question them!

Some good questions to ask yourself when you come across a dubious post are:

• Is this the original account, article, or piece of content?

• Who shared this or created it?

• When was this created?

• What account is sharing this? When was the account created? Do they share things from all over the world at all times during the day and night? Could this be a bot?

• Why was this shared?

Use fact checking websites

Websites like Snopes, Health News Review, and Politifact are made specifically for fact checking. These are great first stops in your fact checking journey. The non-profit Bellingcat also has an amazing compilation of “online investigation” resources that cover the verification of images, social media posts, news articles, and more.

When in doubt, ask for help

If you look into the information at hand and still aren’t sure how true it is, check in with a trusted friend, or therapist perhaps one versed in mental health and psychology. 

It can be intimidating to wade through the dizzying amount of mental health misinformation but with these skills and tips, you’ll be better equipped to parse through it. Luckily, in addition to the misinformation, we also have tons of resources at our fingertips to verify it as long as we’re willing to take the time. Happy fact checking!