Can Sex Therapy Boost My Libido?

If you’ve been experiencing a dip in your libido, you’re not alone. Many individuals and couples go through phases where sexual desire wanes, and this can be frustrating and concerning. One effective avenue to explore is sex therapy. But how exactly can sex therapy help boost your libido? Let’s delve into the ways it can support you in rekindling your sexual desire.

Understanding Libido

Before exploring sex therapy, it’s essential to understand what libido is. Libido refers to your sexual desire or interest in sexual activity, influenced by various factors including physical health, emotional state, relationship dynamics, and life circumstances. Changes in libido can be normal, but when it becomes distressing, seeking help can be beneficial.

The Role of Sex Therapy

Sex therapy is a specialized form of therapy that focuses on addressing sexual issues. A qualified sex therapist can help individuals or couples navigate a range of concerns, from performance anxiety to communication barriers about sexual preferences. Here’s how sex therapy can specifically boost libido:

1. Addressing Underlying Issues

Often, low libido is a symptom of deeper issues—stress, anxiety, depression, or unresolved conflicts in a relationship. A sex therapist can help identify and address these underlying factors, providing tools to manage stress and improve emotional well-being, which can naturally enhance sexual desire.

2. Improving Communication

Many couples struggle with discussing their sexual needs and desires. A sex therapist can facilitate open and honest communication between partners, allowing them to express their feelings and desires without judgment. This improved dialogue can lead to greater intimacy and understanding, ultimately boosting libido.

3. Enhancing Emotional Connection

Emotional intimacy plays a significant role in sexual desire. Through therapy, partners can explore their emotional connection, work through past grievances, and strengthen their bond. When partners feel closer emotionally, their sexual desire often follows.

4. Exploring Sexual Preferences

Sometimes, low libido stems from dissatisfaction with sexual experiences. A sex therapist can help couples explore their sexual preferences and fantasies in a safe environment, encouraging experimentation and playfulness. This exploration can reignite passion and curiosity, leading to increased libido.

5. Addressing Physical Factors

Sex therapists often collaborate with medical professionals to address any physical factors affecting libido, such as hormonal imbalances, medication side effects, or health conditions. Understanding and managing these physical aspects can be crucial in restoring sexual desire.

6. Practicing Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques

Sex therapy often incorporates mindfulness practices to help individuals and couples become more attuned to their bodies and feelings. Techniques like deep breathing, meditation, and body awareness can reduce anxiety and increase present-moment enjoyment, enhancing sexual desire.

7. Setting Realistic Expectations

A sex therapist can help individuals and couples set realistic expectations about libido and sexual experiences. Understanding that fluctuations in desire are normal can alleviate pressure and create a more relaxed approach to intimacy, fostering a more enjoyable experience.

When to Consider Sex Therapy

If you’ve noticed a persistent decline in your libido that impacts your relationships or personal well-being, it may be time to consider sex therapy. It’s important to remember that seeking help is a sign of strength, and many have found relief and improved connection after working with a sex therapist.

TLDR

Sex therapy can be a valuable tool in boosting libido and enhancing overall sexual health. By addressing underlying issues, improving communication, and fostering emotional connection, therapy can create a safe space for exploration and healing. If you’re struggling with low libido, consider reaching out to a qualified sex therapist to embark on a journey toward revitalizing your sexual desire and enhancing your intimate relationships. Remember, you deserve a fulfilling and joyful sexual life!

Anxiety Getting in the Way of Sex? Here Are Some Tips

Anxiety comes in many forms, from generalized to circumstantial to sexual and beyond. Any type of anxiety has the potential to interfere with your sex life. If you're experiencing anxiety, it's important to know that you aren't alone. The good news is that anxiety can be addressed and there are tools to make it easier to have the sex life you want. Sometimes, stigma surrounding anxiety makes it difficult to openly talk about it or to ask for help but in reality there is nothing to be ashamed of. 

Regardless of how you experience anxiety or why, it can affect how you connect with people and yourself which is why it gets in the way of sex. Anxiety has the potential to lower your libido, deflate your confidence, stop you from asking what you want, and prevent you from achieving orgasm - just to name a few effects. You need to figure out the root of your anxiety in order to address it properly. For instance, if your anxiety stems from body insecurity, you may try to spend your energy working on your body image; if your anxiety primarily stems from something like mental illness, this may not be the most efficient way to help your anxiety. Ultimately, there is no one size fits all treatment so it will likely take trial and error to figure out what works best for you. 

Here are some ways to help with anxiety and your sex life:

• Try to be non-judgmentally mindful and stay in the moment. This is easier said than done but if your mind is constantly wandering during sex, it’s hard to enjoy yourself. You can find tips for being more mindful during sex here.

• Talk with your partner(s) about your experience with anxiety. Letting them know that you are experiencing anxiety may alleviate some feelings by getting it out in the open to address. This way, you and your partner can try to work on the problem as a team, as opposed to you navigating it alone.

• Take the pressure off of “goal oriented sex,” like expecting penetration or an orgasm as an integral part of “successful” sex. Physical intimacy takes many forms and unlearning expectations about what it “should” look like can help you enjoy yourself more.

• Give yourself grace. Anxiety is not your fault and you deserve to be patient with yourself as you work through it.

• Therapy is a great option for addressing anxiety if it’s available to you. Consider reaching out to Embrace Sexual Wellness to get in touch with a therapist today!

How to Boost a Low Sex Drive

Everyone’s libido naturally fluctuates due to a variety of factors including stress, menstrual cycles or menopause, negative body image, and more. While it’s not requisite to address low libido if you have no interest in doing so, there are ways to try to increase libido for those who want to. Some circumstantial factors will be inescapable and for those instances, you may need to wait it out. For those who want to try to increase their libido, here are some strategies for doing so. 

Address the issue at the root

In order to address the issue, you need to identify it. Figure out the root cause of your low sex drive. Some factors to consider include stress, hormonal changes like menstrual cycles and birth control hormones, poor body image, relationship issues, medications, and alcohol consumption. If the root issue is neglected, low libido will repeatedly return until it is addressed.

Schedule sex

Many couples are mixed libido, with one desiring sex more frequently than the other. Scheduling time to connect and possibly have sex can help address this, as well as temporary lowered libido. Knowing when you’ll be having sex allows suspense to build and for you to set the mood in advance.

Rule out biological factors 

Biological factors like menopause, depression/anxiety, and stress can all affect libido. If you suspect there is something biologically wrong that is causing the low libido, visit a doctor to figure out what’s going on.

Mix it up

Sometimes libido might be low because sex has become boring. It’s easy to fall into a routine, especially with a long term relationship, but eventually this may no longer feel appealing. Exploring your sexual fantasies and kinks is a great way to experiment and make sex exciting. Read about incorporating kink here. If you’re not into kink or fantasies, try incorporating a sex toy or reading erotica with your partner.

Work on your body image

If you have a hard time with body positivity or neutrality, your self consciousness may be holding you back from desiring sex. Sex is an emotionally and physically vulnerable act. When your body image is suffering, that vulnerability feels even more difficult to achieve which disincentivizes sexual desire. Here are some resources for improving body image:

• Your Body is Not an Apology & Workbook by Sonya Renee Taylor

• Body Positive Power by Megan Crabbe

• The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown

• Happy Fat by Sofie Hagen 

• Health at Every Size by Linda Bacon

• Hunger by Roxane Gay

• You Have the Right to Remain Fat by Virgie Tovar

Evaluate about your medications and contraceptives 

Some medications, such as SSRIs, have libido lowering side effects. If this is posing a significant problem for your sexual satisfaction, talk to your doctor about changing your regimen. Consider the potential role that your contraceptive method has on your libido. If you use certain hormonal birth control, the way it influences your hormonal cycle may affect libido. Discuss with your doctor whether your current contraceptive method is right for you.

Set the mood

An alluring environment can make sex more appealing and enjoyable, likewise a distracting one can get in the way. Some ways to set the mood include lighting candles, wearing sexy clothes or undergarments, listening to sexy music, running a bath, and giving each other massages.

TLDR

Rest assured, low libido is something most people encounter at some point in their life. If after implementing a variety of strategies to increase libido you still struggle with low libido, consider seeing a doctor to ensure nothing more serious is at the root. In instances where emotional issues are at the root, consider reaching out to a therapist. Be patient with yourself and listen to your mind and body.