Relationships

Sexuality Professionals Series: An Interview with Erica Smith

Embrace Sexual Wellness is conducting a multipart spotlight series of interviews with sexuality professionals. If you missed the previous ones, check them out on our blog. For the fourth installment in our interviews, we spoke with Erica Smith (she/her) of Erica Smith Education and Consulting.

Erica Smith spent 17 years working as a sex educator, advocate, and HIV prevention counselor for justice involved youth in Philadelphia, specifically young women and LGBTQ+ youth. Now she offers sexuality education that is tailored specifically to people raised in Purity Culture. Her clients were raised in incredibly restrictive and conservative religious environments that pathologize normal and healthy sexual behavior. Two years ago she started the Purity Culture Dropout Program, where she gives folks all of the medically accurate, queer inclusive, trauma informed, and shame free sex ed that they were denied.

Sex education is a profession that has a wide variety of forms. Some work in a more formal capacity like a school or non-profit, others work freelance. Some choose to become certified, others do not. Some utilize digital media as their main platform, some do mostly in-person work. Some work with youth, others work with adults. Most sex educators have a niche, a few topic areas that they specialize in. For Erica, her focus is battling purity culture. 

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What inspired you to pursue your career path? 
I majored in Women's Studies in college and especially loved the classes on women's health and sexuality. I was very active in feminist politics in school, and my friends and I put on a few sexuality related events that drew a lot of controversy (this was the late 90s at Penn State). I loved doing these events and talking and learning about sexuality. There's nothing else I've ever wanted to do, honestly. 


How does your field differ from that of other sexuality professionals?
As far as I know, I'm the only sex educator who focuses specifically on people raised in purity culture; at least this is what I've been told by many prominent ex-Evangelical mental health professionals who also do purity culture work! 


What is the most rewarding part of your career?
The most rewarding part of my career is witnessing people's lives be truly transformed by the power of sexuality education. Sex education is transformative. It's a social justice issue. Good sex education is power. 


What's the most misunderstood thing about what you do?
That it's all… sexy. That I'm just teaching people the best oral sex techniques and talking about the mechanical aspects of sexual intercourse all day. I am happy to do that stuff and it absolutely comes up, but I'm doing so much more work around things like sexual values, shame, cultural messaging, gender roles and expectations, and things that are quite far from sexually arousing to be honest! Sexuality is such a large topic that touches on so many different aspects of our lives, and the actual act of sex is a rather small part of it.  


What's the most common question you receive from others about your career?
People most often ask how I got started in this field or why I focus on purity culture when I wasn't raised in it.


What advice would you want to share with aspiring sexuality professionals?
That we need more sex educators and that there isn't only one path to becoming one! We need sex educators with a whole variety of experiences and backgrounds and identities.


If you had to describe your work in one sentence, what would you say?
I help people understand themselves and their place in the world better through educating them about sexuality. 


Is there anything you’d like to add? 
Yes! I find social media's role in sex education to be so fascinating. It's a gift. There is great sex ed being put out there by so many people and organizations. This access changes peoples’ lives. 


Thank you to Erica for taking the time to share her perspective. We encourage you to find Erica on social media and her websites, linked below.

Instagram: @ericasmith.sex.ed
Website: purityculturedropout.com

Sexuality Professionals Series: An Interview with Casey Tanner

Embrace Sexual Wellness is conducting a multipart spotlight series of interviews with sexuality professionals. If you missed the previous ones, check them out on our blog. For the third installment in our interviews, we spoke with Casey Tanner (she/they), owner of The Expansive Group.

Casey Tanner is an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist who combines evidence-based research, queer affirming care, and pleasure activism to cultivate powerful relationships. Specializing in gender and sexual diversity, she partners with individuals, relationships, and institutions to expand limited mindsets, foster courageous behavior, and empower meaningful change around gender and sexuality.  After several individuals, couples and businesses sought out Casey’s guidance in making cultural shifts around gender and sexuality, they started The Expansive Group to better meet the growing demand.

Sex therapy is a type of psychotherapy focused specifically on sexual health, function, intimacy issues, and feelings, among other topics. While all sex therapists are formally trained, many but not all are officially AASECT-certified professionals. Typically, though not always, sex therapy is temporary, to address certain issues. Through sex therapy, you can learn to express your concerns clearly, better understand your own sexual needs and better understand your partner's sexual needs.

What inspired you to pursue your career path? 
The life-changing experience of talking about sex and queerness with my own therapist.  This space wasn't available to me until my early 20s and, for so many, is never available.  I wanted to become the space that I needed growing up - everything I do is, in some ways, a love letter to my younger queer self.

How does your field differ from that of other sexuality professionals?
My field (the intersection of therapist, educator, influencer, and consultant) is brand new!  While it's based on best-practices and evidence-based research from each of those individual fields, the combination feels like a new story that I'm writing every day.  There's no (updated) guidebook on how to balance the confidentiality ethics of being a therapist with the nuance of being an educator/influencer.  One of the more unique parts of my job is working with companies who want to do a better job around gender neutral language - I think of it as a sort of large-scale therapy for businesses!

What is the most rewarding part of your career?
Receiving feedback from my audience, students, or team that the space I'm creating means something to them. I get a lot of feedback that folks haven't seen anything like this before, and that really validates the "why" behind the work.

What's the most misunderstood thing about what you do?
That being a gender/sexuality professional means I have my own relationships and identity figured out. Surprise - I don't!

What's the most common question you receive from others about your career?
People often ask me what "queer sex" is. I usually respond with, "queer sex is intimacy that expands beyond the binary - it challenges our ideas on what is or isn't sex, what is or isn't normal, what is or isn't allowed."

What advice would you want to share with aspiring sexuality professionals?
To the extent possible, choose supervisors with a sexuality/queer background. I think direct supervisors are more important than the workplace itself, so don't silo yourself into only working in sexuality-focused practices. If you're able, do an administrative internship with a therapist or educator before graduate school so that you have a great letter of recommendation when it comes time for practicum applications.

If you had to describe your work in one sentence, what would you say?
I expand folks' ideas of what healthy sexuality looks like to include more diversity and more pleasure.

Thank you to Casey for taking the time to share their perspective. We encourage you to find Casey on social media and her websites, linked below.

Sexuality Professionals Series: An Interview with Caitlin V.

Embrace Sexual Wellness is conducting a multipart spotlight series of interviews with sexuality professionals. If you missed the first one with Dr. Shemeka Thorpe, you can find that article here. For the second installment in our interviews, we spoke with Caitlin V. (she/they) of BPP Coaching

According to the biography on her website, Caitlin studied sexuality and public health at Indiana University and The Center for Sexual Health Advancement. There, they discovered scientific revelations about human sexuality and performed ground-breaking research, but realized she really wanted to be helping people with their sex lives on a personal level. Now she does just that as a sex and relationship coach. They educate millions through her YouTube channel, her online courses, and their upcoming TV show.

Sex coaching is built on the idea that sex is a learnable skill. While generally people instinctively know the basic mechanics of sex because of evolution and biology, that doesn’t necessarily mean people intuitively know how to have good sex. Especially for people who grew up in environments lacking models for healthy romantic and sexual relationships, it’s not uncommon to need external guidance for how to have healthy, enjoyable, and safer sex. Generally speaking, the two kinds of sex coaches are talk coaches and experiential coaches. Talk coaches offer a talk therapy based approach supplemented with external resources like books and videos. Experiential coaches, on the other hand, teach a client through talking as well as hands-on practices. This might include breath, touch, and how to emit sexual energy. Sex coaching can help with a variety of needs such as sexual performance anxiety, communication, and boundaries.

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What inspired you to pursue your career path? 
Knowing that sex education was disease-focused, I wanted to add a pleasure-centered perspective to those experiencing shame around sex.

How does your field differ from that of other sexuality professionals?
I am not licensed, which means I can play with ALL the colors of the rainbow and use unorthodox tools and techniques (and I don't have to deal with insurance!).

What is the most rewarding part of your career?
Seeing transformation in people's lives.


What's the most misunderstood thing about what you do?
I don't have any physical contact with anyone, and until recently, I didn't watch footage of them having sex.

What's the most common question you receive from others about your career?
“What kind of training did it require for you to get here?” The answer is a very non-linear and impossible to duplicate path. I encourage them to find their own.

What advice would you want to share with aspiring sexuality professionals?
Do your inner work right alongside your clients. Know that you don't have to know everything, just more than your clients.

If you had to describe your work in one sentence, what would you say?
 Helping people to have the best sex of their lives.

Thank you to Caitlin for taking the time to share their perspective. We encourage you to find Caitlin on social media and her websites, linked below.