Mental Health

I Think I Have ADHD, Now What?

Written by Seth Taylor, ALMFT

If you suspect that you may have Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), you may feel overwhelmed and uncertain about what to do next. ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder that affects children and adults, and it can significantly impact various aspects of life, including work, school, relationships, and daily functioning. If you suspect you have ADHD, take proactive steps to seek assessment, diagnosis, and appropriate interventions. This blog post will provide a comprehensive guide to help you navigate next steps and offer resources for those who experience ADHD symptoms.

Education and Self Assessment

The first step is to educate yourself about ADHD and assess your symptoms. You can start by taking a reputable self-assessment tool, such as the Adult ADHD Self-Report Scale (ASRS), to understand your symptoms and their severity. Remember that self-assessment tools are not diagnostic but they may provide valuable information to be further discussed with a qualified healthcare professional.

Seek Professional Evaluation

If you suspect you have ADHD, it's crucial to seek a professional evaluation from a psychiatrist, psychologist, or neurologist who is experienced and qualified in diagnosing ADHD. A comprehensive evaluation typically includes a thorough clinical interview, a medical and psychiatric history review, and an assessment of ADHD symptoms. It may also entail other evaluations, such as cognitive testing or rating scales.

Educate Yourself about Treatment Options

ADHD is a treatable condition, and various evidence-based treatment options are available, including medication, therapy, and behavioral interventions. Educating yourself about these options is essential, and working with your healthcare professional to develop a treatment plan tailored to your needs and preferences. It's also important to understand the potential benefits, risks, and side effects of ADHD medications and to carefully follow the prescribed treatment plan.

Locate an ADHD Specialist

If you receive a diagnosis of ADHD, it may be important to you to work with qualified healthcare professionals who specialize in ADHD to develop and execute a treatment plan. ADHD specialists may include psychiatrists, psychologists, therapists, or other mental health professionals with expertise in ADHD treatment. They can provide tailored interventions, such as medication management, therapy, or behavioral strategies to address your unique needs and challenges associated with ADHD. Sometimes, you may find professionals that provide both diagnostic and treatment services.

Develop Coping Strategies and Lifestyle Modifications

Developing coping strategies and lifestyle modifications can help manage ADHD symptoms. Coping strategies may include time management techniques, organization skills, creating a structured routine, setting realistic goals, and managing stress. Adopting a healthy lifestyle, including regular exercise, a healthy diet, and adequate sleep can also support overall well-being and help manage ADHD symptoms.

Seek Support and Connect with Others

ADHD can be challenging to manage on your own, and seeking support from others is important. This may include talking to trusted friends or family members, joining support groups or online communities for individuals with ADHD, or working with a therapist to address the social-emotional and psychological challenges associated with ADHD. Connecting with others who share similar experiences can provide validation, understanding, and valuable tips for managing ADHD symptoms.

Learn to Advocate for Yourself

Advocacy and self-empowerment are paramount to effectively managing ADHD. Educate yourself about your rights, accommodations, and available educational, work, or community resources. Develop self-advocacy skills to communicate your needs effectively and assertively, and seek resources and support services to help you navigate challenges and access appropriate accommodations or services. It's important to be proactive in advocating for yourself and seeking the support you need to thrive with ADHD.

Takeaways

If you suspect that you have ADHD, it's essential to take proactive steps to seek evaluation, diagnosis, and appropriate interventions. Educating yourself and developing a way to manage your ADHD in a way that resonates with you can bring lasting impacts on you and your interpersonal relationships. Remember, you are not alone; resources and support are available to help you with ADHD.

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How to Manage Limiting beliefs and Negative Self-Talk

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As the old saying goes, you are your own worst critic. Most people experience some form of negative self-talk and limiting beliefs. Negative self-talk is the inner voice that says self-defeating things like “I can’t do anything right,” or “I am not good at communication.” This internal dialogue serves to validate your core beliefs about yourself, which turns into a self-fulfilling prophecy. For instance, if one of your core beliefs is that you are unlovable, your brain will fixate on the experiences that validate that belief to the exclusion of examples that counteract that belief. When you fixate on those examples, you get stuck in a cycle in which your core beliefs affect your interpretation of the world around you, which in turn reaffirms the core beliefs.

What is a limiting belief?

Limiting beliefs are intertwined with negative self-talk; they are your internal beliefs that you take as absolute truths about what you are or aren’t capable of, how the world works, and how you interact with people. Limiting beliefs often keep us from straying from our comfort zone because it’s easier, less risky, and acts as a defense from hurt and disappointment. Protection from hurt sounds like a good thing, but the word limiting is part of the phrase for a reason. When there is nothing ventured, there is nothing gained. In other words, your limiting beliefs could be preventing you from achieving your goals. Our beliefs are often rooted in childhood experiences, family beliefs, and life experiences. 

An example of a limiting belief is “I’m not good at leadership.” Often, these beliefs are rooted in emotions tied to the past and not rooted in actual evidence. This differs from negative self-talk in that it reflects your beliefs about what you’re capable of as opposed to negative self-talk about your character. Even if there is evidence to support them, that doesn’t mean they are immutable truths. Just because you have not historically been a leader in team dynamics, does not mean you are incapable or unable to try it and learn how to do it.

How do I let go of negative self-talk?

When you engage with negative self-talk and limiting beliefs, it can negatively impact self-confidence, motivation, and achieving what you want. If you experience negative self-talk and limiting beliefs, there are steps you can take to address them and reframe your mindset for the better.

Be intentional about noticing which negative thoughts and beliefs come up habitually

It’s hard to address a problem without fully understanding what it is you want to change. Make a list of the recurring negative thoughts you have about yourself and your capabilities. Then, you can try to identify the origin of these beliefs, which will further flesh out your understanding of what you need to unlearn and how you got to believe these thoughts in the first place.  

Fake it until you make it

Nothing changes if nothing changes. Something has to give when you try to break out of a destructive pattern and that will be uncomfortable. When you go through the motions of counteracting negative thoughts with more positive ones, even if you don’t believe the positive thoughts yet, you will eventually start to believe them after practicing. Remember that your thoughts are not an immutable reality. When you start to recognize that they are just thoughts and that they do not have to control everything you do, you can start to liberate yourself from your inner critic. Sometimes the best way to retrain your brain is to change your behavior first and let the thoughts follow. The caveat to this approach is that the positive affirmations need to be realistic in order for it to be achievable for you to eventually believe them. If you, for example, experience negative self-talk about your appearance, instead of counteracting that with something like “I am the most beautiful person ever,” try something like “I am enough regardless of my appearance.” Another way to utilize “faking it until you make it” is by going for opportunities that your limiting beliefs would have you think you are unqualified for. Go for that promotion or ask that person out; if you wait to do what you want until you are not scared anymore, you will be waiting a long time. If you want to do it, you can do it scared.  

Shift from negativity to neutrality

Making the leap from negative thoughts to totally positive thoughts is daunting! Instead, try “moving toward the task” instead of trying to complete it in one move. Shifting from negative thoughts to more neutral thoughts is a great way to move towards positivity! The changes you make do not need to be seismic to be effective. It is unrealistic and overwhelming to strive for perfection immediately so give yourself credit for any progress you are making.

Let the thoughts simply pass by instead of engaging with them

When we get stuck ruminating over a thought, it feels all-consuming. There is a dialectical behavioral therapy skill called ”teflon mind” which encourages you to simply observe your negative thoughts rather than engaging with them and prolonging the internalization. Your thoughts do not define you and you do not need to take every single one to heart. 

Takeaways

Even after working on it, you will probably still have negative thoughts sometimes. It’s a natural part of being human, especially if your negative self-talk and limiting beliefs have existed for a long time. Something established over years and years cannot be broken down in a few weeks, months, or a few years. If you try some of the approaches listed above and continue to feel overwhelmed by negative self-talk and limiting beliefs, you should consider finding a therapist specializing in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). CBT is a form of therapy that involves restructuring how you think and perceive the world around you, particularly turning negative thoughts into positive thoughts. Negative thinking can take a toll on mental health and well being so trying to change them can improve your life quality greatly.      

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Worried About Personal Safety as a Trans Person? Tips for the Trans Community and Allies

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In light of current political turmoil and discrimination surrounding the transgender and non-binary population, it’s more important than ever for transgender people to be equipped with knowledge to navigate the world as safely as possible. In data released in October 2022 by Everytown for Gun Safety, the number of trans people murdered in the U.S. nearly doubled between 2017 and 2021. There is a constant barrage of mocking pronouns and non-cisgender gender identities by politicians and the public alike. Extremists at the 2023 Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) have called for the eradication of transgender people. It is a deeply scary time to be a trans person especially if you live in a hostile home and/or geographic region. In such a circumstance, there are unfortunately no infallible safety methods, but there are precautions you can take to increase your chances of staying safe.

How Can I Maximize My Safety? 

It’s a good idea to have at least a loose grasp of your region’s political climate so you understand your surroundings better. You should also be aware of the factors that make you an easier target. Unfortunately, trans people who don’t “pass” as a cisgender person are more likely to be harmed, and feminine-presenting trans people are also more likely to be harmed since women are already at a higher risk of experiencing violence. Understanding these factors will help you navigate how cautious you need to be.  

Safety Tips

  • Seek out a local or online self-defense class

  • Navigate public spaces with a trusted friend or family member whenever possible, especially at night

  • Stay alert in public spaces – try to stay off your phone while walking

  • If someone tries to assault you verbally or physically, get loud; this will hopefully scare off the perpetrator and if not, it may get the attention of a good samaritan who can intervene

  • Leave a trail before going out: make sure someone you trust knows where you will be

  • If you live in a hostile home environment, consider compiling a “get away bag” in the event that you need to make a hasty exit for your safety

  • Check out this safety planning tool by Forge, a transgender support organization

  • Seek out the support of a trans supportive organization for funding to access gender-affirming care and/or to move somewhere safer

Forging Community

Building a small community of supportive people in your life to offset the detrimental effects on mental health of the transgender discrimination you will likely face is a vital lifeline. This can be a difficult task if you live in a hostile geographic region; you can try Googling your location plus keywords like “trans support,” “LGBTQ support group,” and “LGBTQ resources.” If that ends up being a fruitless endeavor, it’s time to turn to the internet.

Having friends solely online may not be as fulfilling as friends you can see face to face for most people but it is a far better option than feeling completely isolated in a discriminatory environment.

Here are some online support group options:

Tips for Trans Allies

Being a trans ally is more important than ever. Cisgender people have privilege compared to transgender people and leveraging that privilege is integral to fighting for trans rights and safety.

  • Educate yourself on key terminology relating to gender and the political and wellbeing issues surrounding the trans community 

  • Do not take the liberty of sharing someone’s transgender status with anyone who doesn’t already know. As the LGBTQ organization GLAAD puts it, “Do not casually share this information, speculate, or gossip about a person you know or think is transgender. Not only is this an invasion of privacy, it also can have negative consequences in a world that is very intolerant of gender diversity.”

  • Do not ask invasive questions about a transgender person’s gender assigned at birth or their anatomy

  • Challenge anti-trans rhetoric in conversation; cisgender privilege allows you to do so with much less risk of compromising your personal safety than if a transgender person were to do so

  • Read this comprehensive guide to being an ally for more actionable steps or visit ESW’s resource page

The most important thing to remember as a trans person is that being trans is not bad or wrong and the issues with being transgender have to do with hate and vitriol from bigots, not the inherent nature of being trans. Try to indulge in consuming trans joy content when you feel particularly down about being trans because the reality is that being trans is a beautiful thing and you deserve to feel happy and safe. Your challenges and struggles are real and valid, and they don’t define your wholeness.  

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